My my my my my my my! What an interesting series of rather FORTUNATE events! It has all the makings of a good EPIC! Intrigue! Danger! Beautiful women! Evil beasts! Dashing heroes such as myself, if I must say so... ahem, myself! Let's recap, shall we!?
It would seem you pulled the wool over the General's eyes... or did you?! It's hard to tell what qualifies as a victory these dreams! I mean what did you accomplish with his strike? You ended one threat but gained an even greater one? Who do you ask? Ol' Bandy?! No way! I have bigger emphants to fry! That ol' General was such a bore! YOU INFIDELS! I HAVE COME TO RULE OVER YOU. SUBMIT OR PERISH! Blah, blah, blah, BLAH! Sheesh, give us a break! You and I have been there and done that. It never works out well for the bad guys! It's all fodder for the heroes!
The good ol' boy scout, Xun'rok, seems to have whipped some of those Lyran folks into a frenzy. He's giving them a good ol' show! That second act was a doozy! He managed to sucker Kruugaar! Talk about lights out! I bet them Kadatorii are all angry and bothered. I guess those Lyrans will have their hands full with them ugly sons of....
Speaking of ugly sorts... I hear folks are hatching all kinds of troubles in those silly forts. You might want to keep an eye or two on that!
I also hear that the silly witch has been chased off by the Arretians. It seems she had some kind of important meeting to discuss current events regarding Underlight but the head honchos of Arret want her in custody and they're willing to crush anyone that gets in their way. Scandalous, right? Did you hear about the sudden outbreak of war in the North? It seems the Nordecai brutes have invaded Kurenai and H'karra. BOOM! BOOM! I couldn't make this stuff up on my own!
The pressing question however, Zarty...
When are you going to put a stop to the boy scout and his antics? I know you have your cliche of webs and subterfuge but I'm beginning to think you have lost control of the situation. It's a poor shame. You USED to be such an ominous presence. I'm trying to change my old ways but you make it really HARD to walk that path!
But WAIT! I just had a revelation! A dream-altering inspiration! Or maybe it was that burrito I had earlier! We will have to see!
We will simply have to do brunch again, Zarty! Heads up, I forgot my wallet! Treats on you!
- Ol' Bandy the Hero of Dreams (and Nightmares too)
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“I try to bring the audience's own drama, tears and laughter they know about, to them.”