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Tentacle
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Posts: 192
Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2019 7:18 am
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Post by Tentacle »

I pass through the dreamscape aimlessly, all too aware that I really should be paying more attention to what is going on. But then again, is it really that important?

Over and over again I tell myself, "You're not that different. Don't worry about it! There is a place here for you." But as time goes on I grow more and more frustrated with a number of my peers who seem to be lacking in distinction.

"What is left of that which I cared for? Have I been chasing literal shadows and not metaphorical? Is there anything that remains sacred?"

I've wandered to the Library. I look across the room vaguely hearing protests. Words and energies begin to blend together. A theme rises from the cacophony, "It's not OUR fault..." - accountability remains such a rare treasure.

"Do they really have to have their hands held? Stations of service I may hold, but to what end? How much does it really change? What - am - I - doing?"

I can't help but laugh as I think how I must sound, and yet I am supposed to be spiritually grounded. As this thought washes over me my heart tenses, I get twisting nausea at my core. I cannot resist it any longer and I know that the nihility of my thoughts cannot go without a reckoning.

I return to aimless wandering. Carried as soundlessly as web caught by the wind. Finding a quiet corner and patch of enveloping shadow, I allow supplication to spill forth. Having surrendered my conceit a litany disgorges itself from me with all the pressure behind it of a fractured dam.

"... They may not think of it now. Surely those that would remember have forgotten. Perhaps, even I try to forget. My dreams have been for others. I have been subduing myself with denial. I thought, they could fix me. In service to them, I would have a purpose. There is something with me, it will not be denied..."

Hands folded into my lap, thoughts drifting to those who would label themselves, "friend." Thoughts drift to the recent violence and the emptiness it symbolizes. Words come quietly into my head. Perhaps they will strengthen those that need it. Perhaps, it is I who needs it.

"... Don’t look for dreams virtually free from discomfort, pain, pressure, challenge or grief, for those are the tools the Nameless One uses to stimulate our personal growth and understanding. As the temple shall constantly affirm, you will be helped as you exercise faith in the Nameless One. Faith in the Nameless means we trust it; we trust its teachings. That leads to hope, and hope brings clarity, the pure nature of the Nameless One – that peaceful feeling that comes when we sense its concern, its love, and its capacity to cure us or to ease our burdens with its healing power...

... There have been and will be times in each of our dreams when such faith must be the bottom line; We don’t know what is happening to us or around us, but we know that the Nameless One knows us, and knowing that, for the moment, is enough..."




Let this be enough for now, not all that would bow.... are weak.


The Matron 🕷️
"She spins her golden web between us and the dream." - The Matron ☼, Soulkeeper
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